Shine!

Sometimes we need that tiny spark of light to inspire and encourage a world of darkness. Many of us have evolved for the better: however, still within a dark place we’ve found the strength, the courage, and the will to change. While in a dark place, this metamorphosis of the self- is most of time- a good change. For some of us this can be a reoccurring cycle we go through for long periods of time, and for others it can be as long as we can remember. Change can be achieved but can be extremely difficult as we sit in the dark and try and do it alone. We can be ashamed and embarrassed to let others see or know our inner struggles. We only allow the world around us to see what we want them to see, and we decide to control what shines through and what does not.

 

Grant it, we are changing and for the better, it can be a slow and exhausting process. Many of us are unfamiliar with the mere thought that there is a more comforting way to evolve. Evolving outside of that dark place, evolving as a light, and in the light. Some of us are so accustomed to controlling our glimpse of light that we lose the ability to let all of our light shine at once, and more importantly we lose the ability to allow light to shine inwards! So focused on controlling the light, the spark, that flame that lifts us out of our dark place we create a one-way channel, an outward flow of anything good. Rarely do we allow ourselves the inward flow of all things good, the receiving of light. It’s a living and breathing oxymoron. We are so protected and guarded that our insecurities train ourselves to create a false feeling of security.

 

I am guilty of this… I’ve heard others tell me, “You’ve come this far,” or “Look how much you’ve accomplished,” and “You can do anything when you put your mind to it.” I can be the tinted window. I can deflect the light, the love, and the happiness that others want to share with me. I can deflect the smiles, the laughter, and the comfort. I can sit in a dark place and try and change all by myself. This is a lonely place to be in, an unnecessary struggle, and time to time the walls cave in and it takes more strength to hold them from crushing me. Yes, I have evolved and changed for the better, I have come so far, I have come a long way: however, it’s always been me climbing in and out of dark spaces. So I ask myself and I challenge myself, to crawl out of that dark corner and sit in the sun. To let the rays of light, of everything good shine down on me and to let it all in, to allow what I am not accustomed to, to allow what I am unfamiliar with, to touch me in the ways that I need to be touched, to allow myself to be approachable. I challenge myself to see the light that I am where I stand, to recognize that I am the lighthouse that can bring others in dark oceans safely to shore. I challenge myself to be the beacon that others see in me but do not see in myself. I challenge myself to accept and embrace all the beautiful colors of light that others choose to share with me. I challenge myself to accept help, to accept the hands of love that when faced upward light shoots out of their palms like super-natural power. More importantly, I challenge my self to accept the love God has for me and to come to understand it. I challenge myself to love Him wholeheartedly and listen to His grace.

 

Today I’m tired of evolving in a dark place. I choose to evolve in a space that is already well lit and warm. I choose to evolve in the light, in a space where I can smile and laugh, where I can love the way I was created to love. I choose to feel free in the light like a hawk over a mountaintop and under the sun. I want to feel *connected, close to Him, to the universe, and to all living things. Today I choose to shine!